英语笑话

How Many Pieces切披萨的逻辑

How Many Pieces? A man went to buy a pizza, and the saleslady asked him, "Do you want it cut into smaller pieces? It will be more convenient for you." The man agreed. Then the saleslady asked him again, "Do you want it cut into six or eight pieces?" The man answered, "Six is fine. Eight will be too many for me to eat them all." 切披萨的逻辑 有一个人去买披萨，那个卖披萨的小姐问：“要我替你切小块吗？ 这样吃的时候比较方便。”他说：“OK！”然后那个小姐又问： “要切六块或是八块？”那个买的人说：“六块好了，八块我吃不完。”

A Novel Way to Park创意停车法

A Novel Way to Park There was a young man, a first time driver, who tried to park a car between two others. He put the car into reverse and "bang" ran into the car behind him. And then he put the car back into forward gear, and "bang" hit his front end into the car in front of him. And so back and forth he went, banging both cars each time he went into reverse or forward. So the woman next to him couldn't resist asking him, "Do you always have to use your ears to park?" "Bang! Bang! Bang!" - parking by ears! 创意停车法 一位刚学会开车的年轻人，他想要把车停在两部车中间。 他倒车时，「砰」的一声撞到停在后面的车，然后他往前时， 又「砰」的一声撞到停在前面的车，他就这样在那边前进、后退， 不停地撞到前后的车。坐在他旁边的女士忍不住问他： 「你都是这样靠耳朵听『砰、砰』声来停车的吗？」

Fake Money假钱

Fake Money Jimmy went into a shop, took a toy tank, gave the shopkeeper fake money and started to leave. So, the shopkeeper told him, “Excuse me, little boy, this isn’t real money.” Little Jimmy didn’t reply, continuing walking out of the shop. The shopkeeper repeated himself, and Jimmy kept walking. The third time the shopkeeper called him, “I’m sorry, young man, but this is not real money.” Jimmy looked at the tank in his hands, looked at the shopkeeper and finally said, “And this isn’t a real tank, either.” 假钱 吉米进了一家商店，拿了一个玩具坦克，给了店主假钱就走了 。于是店主告诉他：“对不起，小孩，这不是真钱。” 小吉米没有回答，继续往外走。店主重复自己的话，但吉米继续走。 第三次店主叫住他：“对不起，年轻人，这不是真钱。” 吉米看着手里的坦克，又看着店主最后说：“可这也不是真坦克呀。”

A Dog-gone Good Sermon布道有狗方

A Dog-gone Good Sermon! A minister delivered his sermon in only ten minutes, about half the normal time. He apologized, saying, "I’m sorry to inform you that my dog, who is very fond of paper, ate the other half of my sermon. That’s why I couldn’t deliver the whole thing this morning. I’m very sorry!" After the service, a visitor from another church shook hands with the minister and said, "Pastor, if that dog of yours has any puppies, I want to get one so I can give it to the minister of my church!" 布道有「狗」方 有位牧师十分钟就草草结束讲道，只花了平常一半的时间。 他向教友们致歉，并解释道：「各位，很抱歉，我的狗很爱吃纸， 今天讲道的另一半内容被狗吃掉了，所以我没办法全部讲完，真的很对不起！」 礼拜结束后，有一位从别的教堂来的访客，前来跟这位牧师握手致意， 他说：「牧师先生，您家的狗如果生宝宝的话，能不能送给我一只？ 我想转送给我们教堂的牧师！」