可可爱爱

01.

为什么星期五离星期一这么近，星期一却离星期五那么远，这不科学。

It is not scientific why Friday is so close to Monday, but Monday is so far away from Friday.

02.

搞笑女，我就是搞笑女，搞笑女也配有爱情的好嘛。

Funny girl, I am a funny girl, and funny girls deserve love.

03.

如果你正在读这段话就说明你爱上我了， 如果你想否认， 那为什么还在读。

If you are reading this passage, it means that you are in love with me. If you want to deny it, why are you still reading it?

04.

一个乞丐端着破碗走到我跟前说：“求求你帮个忙吧。”他的手一直在抖 ，我犹豫了一下， 于是帮他端了一会。

A beggar came up to me with a broken bowl and said, "Please do me a favor." His hand was shaking, and I hesitated, so I helped him carry it for a while.

05.

活得越来越像一部西游记， 悟空的压力， 八戒的身材， 老沙的发型 ，唐僧的絮叨 ，而且离西天越来越近。

Living more and more like a journey to the West, the pressure of Wukong, Bajie's figure, Lao Sha's hairstyle, Tang's monk's rambling, and getting closer and closer to the West.

06.

爸，妈，开家长会时要淡定，要从容的面对老师挑拨你我的关系，我是你亲生的!你信我还是信他?

Dad, Mom, be calm when holding a parent-teacher meeting, and face the teacher calmly to provoke the relationship between you and me. I am your own! Do you believe me or him?

07.

别一天到晚只想着减肥，你的嘴同意你这么想了吗？ ​​​​ -- 梦旅人 《毒鸡汤》

Don't just think about losing weight all the time. Does your mouth agree with you? -Dream Traveler's Poisonous Chicken Soup.

08.

有一种凄凉叫这道数学题已经超出了我语文的理解范围。

There is a desolation that this math problem is beyond my understanding of Chinese.

09.

难得的周末， 做个废物， 没有梦想， 吃饭睡觉 ，保持可爱​。

On a rare weekend, be a waste, have no dreams, eat and sleep, and stay cute.

10.

你以为我会眼睁睁地看着你去送死吗？绝对不会，我会闭上眼睛的。 -- 周立波

Do you think I will watch you die? Absolutely not. I'll close my eyes. -Zhou Libo