英语笑话

我不能说是哪一年

Palmist: The life line in your hand tells that you will die in a year. Customer: Good gracious! In a year? Palmist: Yes, but I can't say in which.手相大师：你手上的生命线显示出你还有一年将会死去。顾客：天哪，一年后？手相大师：是的，可是我不能说是哪一年。

As If Awakening From A Dream

A competition which subject is on giving up drinking is proceeding. One of lecturers says excitedly, " Alcohol can break down conjugal（婚姻的） relation, even cause your wife to leave you… " A man shouts out at the news, "Give me another bottle of Brandy." 以戒酒为主题的演讲比赛正在进行，一个演讲者动情地说：“酒精可以破坏夫妻关系，甚至导致妻子离开自己的丈夫……” 这时一个男人大声喊：“再来一瓶白兰地！”

狗也知道这个谚语吗？

The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog. "It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?" "Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?" 一个小男孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。 “没有关系，”一位先生“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道吗？”

动机

My English professor once launched into a lecture on "motivation." "What pushes you ahead?" he asked. "What is it that makes you go to school each day? What driving force makes you strive to accomplish?" Turning suddenly to one young woman, he demanded: "What makes you get out of bed in the morning?" The student replied: "My mother." 我们英文课的教授有一次在课上讲“动机”。“是什么推动你在人生的路上向前走？”他问道，“是什么让你每天上学来？又是什么驱使你追求成功？”冲着一个女学生，他问：“是什么让你早晨从床上爬起来的呢？”学生答道：“我妈妈。”