Tony sighed heavily. He turned in the empty bed, feeling incomplete, like a part of himself had been removed from him, his body crying for the presence of Pepper. It was excruciating. Her scent was still on the sheets so he was sure it hadn't been a dream.
"Jarvis?" He called.
"Yes sir?"
"Where's Pepper?"
"She left the mansion half an hour ago with Mr. Potts for the orthopedic surgeon appointment."
Tony sat in the bed and ran a hand through his hair. "Was that not scheduled to be end of next week?"
"Miss Potts moved the appointment to be today," the AI explained
She probably followed my advice, Tony thought.
He was pleased that Dane would have his splint removed earlier. After seeing the scans Jarvis was running everyday, in his opinion, Dane's arm looked more than fine. Yet, at the same time a shiver passed through his spine at the thought that after Dane's arm was healed, Pepper wouldn't feel obliged to stay in Los Angeles anymore. The image of the night were racing back in his head vividly. His lips on hers, her hands on his body, her voice, her moans, her smell, his name on her lips… He smiled like an idiot. Maybe she will stay in Los Angeles after all.
He stayed in his bed for a few more minutes, lost in the memories of the previous night before heading to the shower and then to the workshop.
It was more than an hour after he had started working on his suit, when a voice screamed from upstairs, "Tony, Tony, Tony!"
"Sir, the young Potts is in approach," said Jarvis.
"No kidding?" Tony quipped sarcastically, while taking his head out of the Iron Man suit.
"Tony, Tony, Tony…" Dane repeated, arriving at the workshop in a whirlwind.
"Dane, how many times I told you to not run on the stairs," Tony said sternly.
Dane gazed at his feet at the words, "Yes I know, I'm sorry."
Tony's heart softened at his little voice, "So what is it that causes you to run on the stairs and in the workshop?" He used the statement to remind him at the same time that running in the workshop was also not allowed.
Dane looked at Tony proudly and revealed his arm in a flourish, raising his eyebrows in excitement. "I came back from the doctor with mum and look, they removed the splint! They said my arm is all fixed!"
Tony lifted him up into his arms and spun his around. "That's really good news, Dane!"
"Yeah, mum said that we'll be able to go back home soon." At these words, Tony slowed down the movement and put him back on the ground.
"That's also good news," he said weakly, not meaning it in the slightest, swallowing hard. He slowly walked back to the table where the suit was lying to hide his disappointment.
"What are you doing?" Dane asked curiously.
"Fixing something on the suit," Tony replied flatly.
"What is it?" Dane asked, reaching for a chair to kneel on and be at the same height as Tony.
"See this part?" Dane nodded. "I need to shunt this circuit to the other one there, so the suit will be able to assemble quicker on my body at my command."
"Oh yeah, so the two pieces will assemble themselves before coming on you and therefore speed up the process by some seconds," Dane proclaimed proudly.
"Yeah, exactly, kid," Tony said, smiling wide. For the last 10 days, Dane had spent a lot of time with him and learnt a lot about the suit. Tony was still amazed at how fast he was able to understand the complex mechanics and such, which reminded him way too much of himself to be totally comfortable with.
After the doctor's appointment, Pepper went upstairs and called her mum to announce the good news about Dane's arm. After hanging up the phone, she started thinking. She had said to her mum that they would be back soon, but she wasn't sure if she wanted to leave anymore. Last night had been so perfect, but at the same time she knew she wasn't ready to forgive yet. She was happy that Dane was spending time with his father, but Pepper didn't know where Tony and her stood with each other. Lost in her thoughts, she finally realized that Dane had been downstairs with Tony for 2 hours now and that it was nearing lunch time. So she decided to go down to the workshop to see how things were going with them. When she arrived at the lab, she could hear and see Tony and Dane talking and giggling as they worked on the Iron Man suit. Dane was on a chair to be at the same level than Tony. Tony was on the other side of the table with Dum-E next to him.
"No, no, no Dum-E!" Tony exclaimed. "How many times do I have to tell you, not this one, this one!" Dane was laughing hysterically, endlessly amused at the image of Tony arguing with his robot. Pepper couldn't resist a smile at the familiar scene of Tony fighting with his bots.
"Tony, I think that you should know by now that Dum-E is as stubborn as you when it comes to listening to someone."
The voice of Pepper surprised Tony and he banged his head on Dum-E metallic arms when he tried to pick himself up. "Ouch..." Tony winced while rubbing his head, which squeezed out another laugher from Dane.
"I thought you said you were just going to tell Tony about your arm?" Pepper asked her son. "I didn't know that that would take more than 2 hours," she added sarcastically.
"I'm sorry Pepper, we got a bit carried away," Tony said winking at Dane.
"A bit? Really?" Pepper quipped, which made Dane smile even more.
"Yeah, Dad was showing me how to do arc welding and I got too into it," he said quickly. Both Pepper and Tony froze at Dane's words. It was the first time that Dane had called Tony something other than 'Tony.' Tony's heart thudded in his chest and Pepper looked at him in the eyes, knowing the effect that the simple word could have had on him. "I'm hungry, can we order the pizza we ate last time?" Dane asked eagerly, not aware at all of what was happening with his parents. Neither Pepper nor Tony reacted to Dane, undoubtedly still in shock, their eyes locked, talking to each other without a word. After few seconds of silence, Dane hesitantly asked again, "What? What is it?" obviously not conscious of why his parents had stopped like that.
Tony was the first one to get back on track. He reached out to Dane to carry him in his arms, "Yeah buddy, let's do that! Pizza it is! Right mummy?" He teased Pepper and walked by her to the stairs.
She raised her eyebrows at him, "Hey!" she called as he climbed the stairs.
After a nice lunch with light conversation, Dane begged to go to swim in the pool now that he was free from his splint. Pepper agreed and the three of them headed to the pool at the back of the mansion. Dane didn't know how to swim yet and so Tony tried his best to teach him which provoked many laughs from both Dane and Pepper. Pepper sat at the edge of the pool, her feet in the water and a big sun umbrella bent at an angle that let her enjoy a nice shadow. She enjoyed the sight of Tony and her son playing and laughing in the water. Her heart filled with a strange kind of warmth. She could easily get use to this, but a small voice behind her head told her that it was better to stick to her plans and leave. She needed to go back to her comfort zone to think this straight. She did not have the luxury to make mistakes now that Dane was involved. She had to be sure of her choices, because now they were involving not only her but her son as well, or more precisely, their son.
Dane was having fun on an inflatable kind of duck with his water wings well in place on his arms, when Tony came closer to Pepper and grabbed her feet gently, his hand gently caressing her calf. Shivers went through Pepper legs and she held back a moan.
"Hey you, come in the water with us," he purred. She removed her feet from his embrace and his grin vanish from his face, "I'm sorry Pep, I didn't mean to…"
She cut him off, "It's ok, Tony. I just don't want to lead you on," she said flatly,
"What do you mean lead me on?" He was obviously not getting what she meant.
"What happened yesterday night was something we both needed," a genuine smile appeared on his lips, "and it was…"
"Amazing?" he interrupted.
"As a matter of fact, yes it was," she said cracking a smile. "But…"
"No please Pepper, no but."
"But Dane and I are leaving tomorrow," she said ignoring his words.
His grin disappeared. "Why?" He asked desperately.
"Because that is what we agree on, we would stay until Dane recovers and Dane is alright now," she said, not looking at him. "So we should go back home," she finished.
"This is your home, Pepper."
"No, this was my home, Tony," she said, looking at him deeply in the eyes. She knew she hurt him deeply saying that.. She could read the pain in his eyes and she would have never imagined that it would be that painful for her to say it too.
Tony was speechless, he just looked at her and then at Dane. He leaned on the concrete that was surrounding the pool and lifted himself out of the water. He stood up without looking at her and before he started to walked back to the mansion he said, "I'll be in the workshop."
Pepper suddenly found herself alone, sad and so empty, sitting on the edge of the pool, with her son now playing alone in the water.
When diner time came, Pepper and Dane sat at the table alone.
"Where's Tony?" Dane asked.
"He is busy, baby."
"He won't have dinner with us?" he asked, hurt.
"I don't think so sweetheart, he'll probably have dinner later today," she was lying and she knew it.
"Ok," he said visibly not happy about it.
Meanwhile in the workshop, Tony was sitting in front of his screens that were showing random plans and designs. His eyes were lost and not really focusing on what was in front him. During this past two weeks, He just realized what they could have been and he was deeply sad because he knew now that they would probably never be that!
"Sir, Miss Potts is asking you for the third time to come up for diner," Jarvis said in a kind of reproachful tone.
He knew that he should go up, but he was drained. He didn't know how to convince her anymore. He was feeling his life to slip slowly from his grip. He knew Pepper, he knew her well, she said she would leave and he knew she would actually leave. She was as stubborn as him sometimes… Most of the times… Maybe that's why they were, or at least used to go along so well. He stayed still in front of his screens for what seems to be an eternity.
"Sir, the young Potts is going to bed and from what I'm hearing he is asking for you," Jarvis informed him.
"Thank you Jarvis," he said, but he stayed still. He had promised himself that if Pepper took the decision to leave and removed him from their life, he would respect it. So he was going to.
After few minutes, he heard footstep approaching
"Really?" Pepper asked obviously mad "Are you really doing that?"
He turned to look at her,"What?"
Pepper sighed in exasperation "You can be mad at me, but Dane doesn't have anything to do with it," she exclaimed, "He was waiting for you to come up for dinner!" She almost shouted, "He even asked for you when I put him to bed," she added in defeat. "And here you are," she waved at the workshop "You can't do that to him Tony!" she concluded.
"What do you want from me Pepper?" he asked clearly overwhelmed by the whole thing.
"Nothing," she said bitter "I don't wait or want anything from you anymore Tony since…" She stopped herself halfway in her sentence.
"Say it," he said standing up to face her. "Say it Pepper," the volume of hi voice increasing. "You don't want anything anymore from me since I destroyed both of our lives." he finished for her with anger in his voice. She sighed and gazed at her feet. "I wish I could have an eraser Pepper! I really wish I could turn back time! If only I could make you feel what I felt at that time or even what I feel know. But truth is I cannot. I'm trying to make amends but apparently it is not working. I'm tired of screwing up everything I'm doing. So tired! So I'm asking you again, what do you want from me?" His voice was reflecting how drained he was by the whole situation
"Don't destroy Dane's life, that's all what I want from you," she stated. "Be a father for him, be there for him and don't failed him like you failed me," she added, tears in her voice.
Tony was surprised by her words, "You want me to be part of his life?" He asked in disbelief.
"You are his father Tony."
"But you…" he started.
She cut him off "As I said earlier what was or what is happening between us doesn't have anything to do with Dane and your relationship with him."
He let out a sad sigh, "Thank you," he said.
"What for?" she asked, surprised.
"I thought you would leave with him and not let me near him again," he admitted.
"I would never do that, he is your son. But I swear Tony, don't screw up with him, because if you do, I will make you pay in the worst way you could imagine" she threatened.
"I won't, I promise Pepper."
"I have hard time with your promises, but I will give you the benefit of the doubt on this one. Be careful, you are his father and he is just a kid, he will admire you, actually I'm pretty sure he does already, don't break the perfect image he has of you. He is the most precious thing I have on this earth, don't hurt him!"
"He is precious to me too, Pepper. I have never imagined myself as a father before, but since I met Dane, everything is different. He is the best part of me and you, Pepper." He said as he approached her. "I'll do better than my dad, that's what I promised myself," he finished almost inaudibly, lost in his thoughts, then making eye contact with her again, he explained, "I promise myself that if you let me see Dane, I would be a much better father for him than my dad was for me. I'll do everything for him, because you and he are everything for me."
A shy smile grew on Pepper lips and as if to give something to Tony to hold on she said, "To be honest with you, I think he is already starting to get attach to you".
Tony smiled slightly at Pepper statement, "How often would I be able to see him?" He asked.
"For a start, let's try a weekend every now and then. He is still young, we need to see how is coping with it," Tony nodded, "We've never been separated yet," she added knowing that the separation would be probably more difficult for her than for Dane.
"Maybe, I could take him to the New York penthouse, it is closer to Virginia if he wants to go back to see you. Plus we won't lose too much time in the journey," he offered.
"Yes, that's actually a good idea" she said a bit surprised about Tony's initiative.
After a long moment, Tony broke the silence, "Is there anything I can say or do to convince you to stay?" He asked.
She looked at him in the eyes and shook slowly her head "No…" she whispered.
"But you love me," he pleaded with her while closing the gap between them.
"I do love you Tony," she admitted. "I do, I did and will always," she gently caressed his cheek, "But sometimes, love is just not enough."
"Pepper," he implored.
"Love needs trust, Tony," she said, tears in her voice. "I've had too many good cries for you and all your craziness and I'm tired of it. You can't blame me for that," tears rolled slowly on her cheek,"You can't end up or start up our relationship as you please. When you don't want me anymore, I should obey and leave and when you decide that you are ready again, then I should be ok with it with it, no second thoughts?"
"It's not like that Pepper, you know that," he tried to defend himself.
"Maybe, but it is how I see it," she stated, "This is my time to say goodbye to you."
"No," he said placing his hands on her face and pulling her to close the gap between their lips.
5 years ago, she tried to kiss him to make him change his mind and like 5 years ago, he tried to kiss her too to make her change her mind. 5 years ago, he had kissed her back, and like 5 years ago, she was kissing him back too. But, 5 years ago, the kiss hadn't made him change his mind, and like 5 years ago, she didn't change her mind and two days later, Pepper and Dane left the mansion.
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